If you and your partner have committed to honoring God and your bodies by waiting until marriage to have sex, it’s important to support each other in this decision.
As a woman, avoid visiting your fiancé in clothing that reveals tempting areas of your body, such as your breasts, cleavage, belly, back, and thighs. Cover them properly to avoid tempting him.
Refrain from visiting him late at night or considering staying over at his place for whatever reason. Avoid situations that might compel you to spend the night in his house, such as bad weather (rainfall) or traffic. These situations can lead to compromising decisions.
When visiting, if he lives alone, bring a friend or meet in public places like restaurants, cafes, the beach, or shopping malls. Don't visit him alone if he's alone, even if he is sick.
If you find yourself in a situation where he is unusually pressuring you for sex (for the first time - because of inflamed passion), remember that this is not the time for discussions about your agreement. He is not in control of himself at that moment. Instead, prioritize your commitment and simply leave. The Bible says to flee! There’s no need for discussion, preaching, or pleading; just leave immediately. This action will help him and preserve your relationship, if it’s truly meaningful.
Even if he threatens to end the relationship if you leave, don’t be intimidated. What he says in that moment does not reflect his true feelings; it’s a temporary reaction. Once he regains clarity, he will appreciate your decision, and your relationship will continue if he truly loves you.
As a man, avoid calling her late at night to share feelings of loneliness or to discuss your future sex life in marriage. Don't give satan a room to tempt you both to engage in sexting, phone sex, or lust.
Refrain from initiating romantic gestures like kissing, hugging, cuddling, or caressing. Save these expressions of affection and intimacy for marriage.
Lastly, remember the wisdom of Song of Solomon 8:4: "Do not awaken love until the time is right." Do everything you can to avoid sex before marriage; once it occurs, it can be extremely challenging to stop, potentially jeopardizing your relationship and disrupting your marriage plans.
Stay vigilant.
~Precious Victor Akah
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