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  • Writer's picturePrecious Victor Akah

Love And Commitment Are Intertwined


What holds marriage together through the highs and the lows is commitment, not feelings. So you want to marry someone who understands commitment and is willing to give it to you and to the marriage, not someone who is merely professing love, without understanding that love and commitment are intertwined.

If you love someone really, you would not abandon them when challenges hit your marriage or start treating them badly when they're temporarily unable to do the things they used to do to cater for the family because an unfortunate incident befell them.

Denying your husband food, denying him your body, abusing and disrespecting him in front of your children just because he lost his job or means of livelihood does not prove you understand commitment.

Mocking your wife, threatening her with divorce, or torturing her just because she's experiencing delay in childbirth does not prove you understand what commitment is.

Love is commitment and commitment is a fruit of love. If you love someone, you'll commit to loving them, in good and in bad times. When they're sick in their body, you do not abandon them in the hospital to go and frolic with prostitutes or unchaste fellows. When their body or figure transforms after childbirth, you do not plant your eyes on the bodies of other women. When they're down in their finances, you do not go behind their back to sleep around for money. Rather, you stick with them. You stand with them and pull through that challenge together, that is commitment.

Understand commitment and its importance in marriage, so you do not just marry a man or woman only because you feel enraptured and incredibly excited whenever you see them or converse with them or spend time with them, mistaking that to be love. Love is beyond feelings.

Feelings do not last; commitment does. Feelings come and goes; commitment stays. Feelings changes; commitment is constant.

When amorous feelings go, commitment is what stays and sustains a marriage relationship. Where there is only feelings, with no commitment, the marriage rarely stands a chance of survival.


~Precious Victor Akah


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