Precious Victor Akah
Pregnancy Before Marriage
To Christian Brothers and Sisters,
There is nothing to be confused about here: if he wants pregnancy before marriage, he obviously does not have the fear of God, and if she is fine with such and is willing to get pregnant (so that the marriage can take place), there is no fear of God in her. It is crystal clear, and any true child of God would know this, because whoever fears God has reverence for God's Word and lives by it.
Moreover, true love is unconditional. So his condition of pregnancy before marriage practically refutes and disproves his confession of true love for you.
Love is not selfish; love is not self-centered. A man who asks for pregnancy before marriage is simply saying: "I cannot marry you if you cannot give me a child first because having children is more important to me than being married to you. I love you as long as you can give me children. If you can't give me a child, you're of no use to me. I'll actually divorce you after marriage or marry a second wife if you can't give me as many children as I want in marriage." He wants children more than he wants you (that's if he really wants you to begin with) because he is marrying FIRST for procreation and not for companionship or love.
You should understand this as a woman. Because if you give in to his request and become pregnant (just so you can marry and become a "Mrs") remember that the unexpected and the unforseen does happen.
So if after marriage you unfortunately lose the child for any reason and cannot conceive again or if after marriage you're not able to bear more children as he desires (which is the principal reason he married you in the first place: he considered you to be fruitful after you became pregnant for him before the marriage), you know that you cannot have peace, rest, and joy in that marriage.
And before you know it (remember he does not have the fear of God), he marries a second wife or divorces you. Who then was taken advantage of here? Work with the wisdom of God. Even if you have more children for him after marriage, it does not change the truth that he does not have true love for you. And, true love still exists, in case you're thinking it does not. You can never compare a marriage where you're genuinely loved by your spouse to a marriage where your spouse is only concerned with the welfare of the children and does not care at all about you.
Lastly, asking for pregnancy before marriage is a demonstration of unbelief, doubt and faithlessness, because you do not have faith that God - Who gives children - will bless you and your spouse with children after marriage. And just so you know, asking a woman to become pregnant (to confirm if she's fruitful) before you marry her does not give you 100% guarantee that she'll give birth to many more children after marriage, because the unexpected does happen; so this logic or seemingly "wisdom" is foolishness.
Sisters, please consider the future in your decisions. Don't just focus on the present because you're "in love" or you desperately want to become a "Mrs". Since God knows the end from the beginning and He has given you wisdom to live by in His Word, you'll be very wise to follow His counsel and heed His instructions on romantic relationships.
~Precious Victor Akah